10 Most Vile, Disgusting Candies We’ve Ever Had

By PopLurker Readers and Aaron Russell

 

Think back to Halloween as a kid. You went Trick or Treating. You came home.

What did you do?

Well, if you had parents that didn’t care whether or not your stash was poisoned and left you to your own devices, it probably went as such: You dump out your sack. You separate chocolate from non-chocolate. You throw non-chocolate items in the garbage.

And people think getting organized is hard. Pfffft.

Not all candy is a winner, and today on PopLurker, our readers had some strong feelings toward some disappointing candies.

 

10) Cherry Cordials

10 CherryCordial

“Cherry Cordials bum me out. Like, you have chocolate and then get this disappointing burst of gloppy, medicinal, fake cherry sadness jizz.” 

 

9) Fruit Truffles

09 FruitTruffles

“Basically any fruit truffle. That horrible, jarring, squishy bite. It’s like you’re biting into a dead mouse.”

 

8) Palmer’s (fake) Chocolate

08 Palmer

“Anything Palmers, that one brand with the rabbit logo. They sell it at dollar stores usually, but the chocolate bums me out. They look SO delicious but just end up tasting cocoa and oil. Nothing more than prop food.”

 

 7) Twizzlers

07 Twizzlers

“Twizzlers. every few years I forget how terrible they are and think… it’s gotta be better this time. Nope. It’s like biting into actual rope. Then to make it even more disgusting they made it in licorice flavor. Licorice is an abomination. Fuck Twizzlers.”

 

6) Jujubees

06 Jujubes

“Jujubees. Like what are you and why do you get stuck in my teeth for the next 10 years?”

 

5) The Boozy-Rum-Drunk Candies

05 BoozeCandy

“That version of the cherry candy with alcohol in them. I wasn’t sure if they really existed, or if that was something parents told kids so they wouldn’t eat their candy. But those boozy little fuckers…those are the ones I’m really looking for.”

 

4) Peeps

04 Peeps

“I get nauseous just watching someone eat Peeps. My husband loves them. I try not to be rude, but it’s everything in my power not to gag upon sight.”

 

3) Necco-Wafer-Smarties-Chalk Candy

Young teacher near chalkboard in school classroom
Young teacher near chalkboard in school classroom

“I remember I was fed chalk once, but then I learned they were just Neco Waffers.”

 

2) Werther’s Original

02 Werthers

“Werther’s Original because they remind me of death. Who are they market toward? Just old people alone in a house with a glass bowl full of Werther’s, good and ready to give up.”

 

1) Candy Corn

01 CandyCorn

“Stop telling me there is good candy corn. The only good candy corn is the dead candy corn. I hate it all.”

 

Aaron is the modern day Willy Wonka. You can find him on Twitter or see his Photoshop creations on his website.

If you like what you see here, you can follow PopLurker on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram!

 

Statement: PopLurker is not owned by a corporation. We are a small collective of writers trying to make content that will make the internet a happier place. When you show our Patreon some love, you’re supporting the little guy whose sole mission is to help make your day a little brighter. If you’re able to, please contribute so we can continue making more hilarious content!

2 Comments

  1. Aw, cordials aren’t that bad, especially if you makes your own, and Werther’s are great. I love the Death comparison, though. This made me sad, my grandpa (may Hades leave him to enjoy all of his naps) used to give me those!

    LOL

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Werther’s are amazing. The death thing was too funny not to use, but that reader is crazy! And I’m sure home made cordials are delicious. Home made candy is always the best! Thanks for reading!

      Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s