Think back to Halloween as a kid. You went Trick or Treating. You came home.
What did you do?
Well, if you had parents that didn’t care whether or not your stash was poisoned and left you to your own devices, it probably went as such: You dump out your sack. You separate chocolate from non-chocolate. You throw non-chocolate items in the garbage.
And people think getting organized is hard. Pfffft.
Not all candy is a winner, and today on PopLurker, our readers had some strong feelings toward some disappointing candies.
10) Cherry Cordials
“Cherry Cordials bum me out. Like, you have chocolate and then get this disappointing burst of gloppy, medicinal, fake cherry sadness jizz.”
9) Fruit Truffles
“Basically any fruit truffle. That horrible, jarring, squishy bite. It’s like you’re biting into a dead mouse.”
8) Palmer’s (fake) Chocolate
“Anything Palmers, that one brand with the rabbit logo. They sell it at dollar stores usually, but the chocolate bums me out. They look SO delicious but just end up tasting cocoa and oil. Nothing more than prop food.”
“Twizzlers. every few years I forget how terrible they are and think… it’s gotta be better this time. Nope. It’s like biting into actual rope. Then to make it even more disgusting they made it in licorice flavor. Licorice is an abomination. Fuck Twizzlers.”
“Jujubees. Like what are you and why do you get stuck in my teeth for the next 10 years?”
5) The Boozy-Rum-Drunk Candies
“That version of the cherry candy with alcohol in them. I wasn’t sure if they really existed, or if that was something parents told kids so they wouldn’t eat their candy. But those boozy little fuckers…those are the ones I’m really looking for.”
“I get nauseous just watching someone eat Peeps. My husband loves them. I try not to be rude, but it’s everything in my power not to gag upon sight.”
3) Necco-Wafer-Smarties-Chalk Candy
“I remember I was fed chalk once, but then I learned they were just Neco Waffers.”
2) Werther’s Original
“Werther’s Original because they remind me of death. Who are they market toward? Just old people alone in a house with a glass bowl full of Werther’s, good and ready to give up.”
1) Candy Corn
“Stop telling me there is good candy corn. The only good candy corn is the dead candy corn. I hate it all.”
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