Sex.
Uh huh huh huh…
Personal sexual history is a long, sordid thing. Forget being nostalgic for Squeez-Its, we miss the good old days of wild, random, “Gotta do this thing anywhere” hook ups! So today on PopLurker, we asked our readers to recount and share some of their most memorable public sexy-time sessions, and their answers were nothing short of…
Boioioioioing.
18) Performance Art
College classes means sometimes you get the afternoons off. Me and my bf at the time went up some random hill near his house to hook up in the car. Houses only on one side so we thought we were semi private. When all was said and done, we look around to find we had a small audience of 3 or 4 gardeners just sitting, eating lunch, and watching. We got out of there so fast! I was so embarrassed.
17) Marking Your Territory
Back of a truck, roof of a house, movie theater (I still want to wash my hands after being a movie theater considering how incredibly common this is) The photo department dark room, some broom closets, utility closet in a bar, dinner bathroom, “the woods” (not exactly public) Automated car wash, picnic table at a rest area…
16) Fairy Tale Fuck Tower
In high school I would sneak out, a lot, and my boyfriend and I would have the town to ourselves. We boned on playground structures, in cars, it was amazing. But I would have to say the most memorable time was when we jumped the fence to our high school and did it in the baseball announcers tower. It just felt so cool and private.
15) Going for a Drive
When I was a teenage, I used to fuck in the car. All the time. With any partner my horny, grubby self could get their hands on. Near parks, in suburban neighborhoods, up in the mountains, in parking lots, just everywhere. My body was the same size, height and weight wise as it is today but you’re just effortlessly limber when you’re young. Now I look at the back seat, front seat, anywhere in a car really and I just think…how did I do that?
14) Snoopy had no Idea…
Knotts Berry farm will always be special to me, specifically the log ride and the Indian cabin show…. sweet jesus…. hands, fingers… sweet memories…
13) Lux-Life
The one I’m proudest of is in the bathroom at the Guggenheim museum in New York. So fancy!
12) Hilarious Jail Time
I did get fined once for making out at the scenic overlook on Mulholland Drive after dark. It was kinda funny because the cop very specifically asked me if I was there of my own volition and I was super tempted to joke around; I showed full restraint and said I was, which just amounted in the ticket.
11) Giddy-up
Let’s just say my motorcycle was great for two types of riding…
10) Mark of Shame
I once did it at a park in the woods in my wild, wild youth. I got poison oak on my butt.
9) Everybody Watch Me, Damn It!
On top of the subwoofers under the screen at a movie theater…rooftop of my old high school…Getty center family bathroom…blowies on the haunted mansion…
8) Dem Tax Dollars at Work
My high school home economics patio area.
7) Frost Bite
On the hood of a car in an industrial park near my house. It was an unseasonably warm December evening, but then part way through doing the deed Mother Nature remembered it was December and it started to snow. That quickie became even quicker.
6) Wrong Wet Carpet
One of my exes had a cash under the table job cleaning up rental homes after tenants moved out. We started making out on the freshly shampooed carpet. He put his hand down the front of my jeans and I saw the yard crew watching through the window. I made him stop. He was mad.
5) FORE!
Castle Park Mini-Golf in Sherman Oaks. Somewhere between the 8th and 9th holes.
4) Checking “Hot Foreign Guy” Off the List…
An Italian girl that didn’t speak English in some random alley in the city of Perugia. when I lived there for a year I had to spend 2 weeks with a family. and one of their neighbors was a girl a year or so younger than me. I guess she really wanted to get with the American guy living next door. One of my last days there we were out and about with a group of friends and she had it set up so at some point she could drag me into an alley and have her way with me. So she just grabbed my hand and did exactly that. Not many minutes of my life… but it’s a memory that will last a lifetime.
3) “Intimate” settings
A stranger’s driveway between their two cars somewhat on the trunk of one. At one point we set off a motion light and stopped for a few panicked moments but resumed when we realized it was automatic. I’ve also done the “under the table at dinner while we’re out with friends” a few times to completion on both sides.
2) Dinner and a Quickie
Public hiking trail. Was nearly caught by my group turning around to find us and a family coming up behind. Also, a bathroom of a Tex-Mex restaurant. It wasn’t so bad, I just worried for the poor sink.
1) Magic Orbs
On a boy-scouts built nature trail on the Eastern Shore of Virginia. We couldn’t find the Geocache so *we decided to fuck instead. -flicks cigarette-
*and by we I mean me.
Follow PopLurker on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram!
Statement: PopLurker is not owned by a corporation. We are a small collective of writers trying to create content that will make the internet a happier place. When you show our Patreon some love or even just Buy us a Coffee, you’re helping out the little guy whose sole mission is to help your day be brighter. Please contribute so we can continue creating more hilarious content!
Well I beat all of that. We did it in a church behind the alter 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
AAAOOOOWWW!
LikeLiked by 1 person